Embracing Family Life in Barcelona – A Psychologist’s Journey

Leigh Matthews is an experienced Psychologist who moved from Australia to Barcelona in 2011. She founded Therapy in Barcelona in the same year, expanding it to a group practice in September 2018.

Here she shares some of the highs and lows that have mapped out her journey as a foreigner in Catalonia, a mother, wife and entrepreneur. 

In August 2011, I stood on the cusp of a new chapter, filled with the anticipation and trepidation of starting over in a foreign land. The bustling streets of Barcelona, vibrant with life and culture, contrasted starkly with the familiar rhythms of Australia. Here, 16,954 kilometres from home, I was not just Leigh; I was an immigrant, a dreamer, newly married to a Catalan man, and soon to be a mother and entrepreneur. The process of redefining ‘home’ began in earnest.

It took time to fall in love with Barcelona. Her charm lies in her ability to embrace the new and the old, the local and the international. As a psychologist, I see this dynamic interplay mirrored in the lives of other expats who choose this city as their new home. Our stories of cultural adjustment, language barriers, isolation, and the quest for belonging bind us together.

Starting Therapy in Barcelona in late 2011 was about creating a sanctuary for the English-speaking international community—a place for understanding and professional support.

My journey then took a profound turn when I became pregnant and gave birth in 2012. The joy of welcoming a new life was intertwined with the challenge of missing my close-knit network of women back in Australia. However, I found solace and camaraderie in MumAbroad’s resources, and among a group of international mums-to-be, forging bonds that eased the loneliness. Though I intended to integrate, I have found my place more in the expat community—in our gang of “in-betweeners.”

Raising my little Australian-Catalan-Spaniard, a third culture kid, has been an adventure. Navigating an intercultural marriage and raising a child in a trilingual environment adds layers of richness and challenges. There are moments when I felt, and still feel, out of place, grappling with language barriers and cultural nuances, but these also add novelty and interest to my daily life. I think I would be so bored back in Australia.

Here’s a secret: I’ve returned to Australia only three times in 13 years—once to introduce our newborn, the rest for illness and death. The logistical and financial burden of long-haul flights, coupled with jet lag and emotional upheaval, make these trips daunting. Being back in my culture of origin highlights the strangeness of returning to Barcelona, where I am once again the foreigner. This in-between feeling can be raw and painful, and it takes weeks to readjust to my immigrant life.

Navigating Spanish-Catalan in-law dynamics has been another layer of the expat experience. The cultural differences and family pressures have required patience and understanding, yet facing these issues has brought my husband and me closer. My friend Bob from Belgium, who emigrated to Australia, visited me five years after my arrival in Barcelona and said, “It took me 10 years to feel at home in Australia.” His words reassured me that feeling at home is a very gradual process.

The journey also brought sorrow. Losing both my parents and flying back to Australia to accompany them in their transitions to death, and then cleaning out my childhood home, was an emotional task, compounded by the realisation that I no longer have a true ‘home’ there. These experiences underscored the importance of the life I am building in Barcelona, marked by significant decisions like committing to a mortgage for a home, expanding my practice from a solo to a group therapy practice, and raising my son here. I consider Barcelona to be the place I will live for the rest of my life. 

I’m not the only Aussie captivated by Barcelona. Robert Hughes, Aussie journalist and art critic, spoke of his long-standing love for the city, describing it as “one of the most vibrant and fascinating cities in Europe.” His reflections on its rich history, art, and culture in his book ‘Barcelona’ echo the sentiments of many expats who have made Barcelona their home. It is a tome every Barcelona expat must read.

Sure, we could all pick up sticks and fly back to our passport countries, who hasn’t wanted to from time to time? I stay because I have built a life, a home, a business, and a family here. I adore Barcelona and her modernista magnificence, her relaxed rhythm, and her unique culture, her tumultuous history. I love this metropolis that retains the pace of a pueblo. Yes, my Spanish and Catalan are hilariously far from fluent, but every immigrant has her own path. One of my strengths is your weakness; one of your strengths is my weakness. Let’s carry on with grace and pride in the essential bravery it takes to live in a foreign land.

As I look back on my journey, I am filled with gratitude for the city that welcomed me and the community that inspired me to create a haven for expat therapists and clients at Therapy in Barcelona. Barcelona is not just a city; it’s a testament to the resilience and adaptability of those who choose to call it home. And for me, it will always be a place where the journey of self-discovery and growth continues to unfold, one story at a time. 

About Therapy in Barcelona 

Therapy in Barcelona comprises an international team of expat psychologists offering personal development and psychotherapy services to the English-speaking international community, including adults, couples, children (5+), teenagers, students, digital nomads, and families. They provide culturally sensitive support to expatriates in Barcelona and worldwide.

With a diverse team, they offer various specialties and therapeutic frameworks, ensuring a personalised match for every client. The team is also multilingual, offering therapy not only in English, but also, in Polish, French, Swiss-German, Swedish, German, Portuguese, Hebrew, Afrikaans, Spanish, and Catalan.

To find out more about Therapy in Barcelona and book a free discovery call with their intake coordinators, Joanna or Judy, visit their website www.therapyinbarcelona.com or Whatsapp Joanna on +34 644522369 Monday to Thursday or Judy on +34 659368335 Wednesday to Friday.

Read more insightful articles from Leigh, including how Therapy in Barcelona can help with the challenges of family relocation and how to navigate intercultural relationships.

Leigh also contributed her reflections, advice and thoughtful analysis to each chapter of #LivingTheDream: Expat Life Stripped Bare, an anthology of 9 fascinating stories of life abroad, edited by MumAbroad founder Carrie Frais.