The Positive Birth Movement was founded in October 2012 by Milli Hill, a mother of three small children and a freelance columnist, from the U.K. Milli thought that many women currently do NOT have positive births and that by sharing information, we might empower each other, thus facilitate change. Well, her “attempt” ended in a network of 450 groups worldwide, including ours in Hamburg, Germany. This tells a lot about its necessity and success.
According to Positive Birth Movement’s website positive birth means: “A birth in which a woman feels she has freedom of choice, access to accurate information, and that she is in control, powerful and respected. A birth that she approaches, perhaps with some trepidation, but without fear or dread, and that she then goes on to enjoy, and later remember with warmth and pride.” The aim of the organisation is to challenge the epidemic negativity around childbirth by bringing women together, support them and empower them to approach birth differently.
We inform and empower international women living in Hamburg for having joyous pregnancies and birth experiences. New mothers attend our meetings too, telling their positive stories, which is a great thing! So many times pregnant women hear horror stories about birth nowadays and this is not helping them. Not to mention that often, international women find camaraderie and new friends in our group, a community that supports each other! We meet in Hamburg at Ellippa Cafe – Eppendorfer Baum 23, 20349 or alternatively at Cafe Elisa – Conventstraße 21, 22089 and we announce the meetings via our Facebook group where we also share articles, thoughts and encouragement for our members.
I think the most important role of our meetings is that it can help pregnant women to hear positive birth stories from other moms. In our culture, we hear most of the time not so encouraging things about childbirth, from different channels (media, doctors, even from our well-intentioned relatives and friends). In the last century, we were conditioned to believe that childbirth is a dangerous, medical event in a woman’s life, which is not entirely true. Most of the women have healthy, risk-free pregnancies, all they need is encouragement, support and education, which we hopefully provide within our meetings and Facebook group.
I am a doula and a hypno-doula. A doula is a non-medical trained professional who provides physical, emotional and informational support to women in late pregnancy, during birth and postpartum time. During labor, the doula will make non-medical suggestions such as breathing, relaxation, positioning, will provide massage or special techniques that help alleviate discomfort. Studies show that when doulas are present at birth, women have shorter labor, fewer medical interventions, fewer cesarean sections and healthier babies. Birth partners find doulas great too, because they become more relaxed and confident in their abilities to help the mother. Doulas meet with parents prior to birth a few times, have continuous contact via telephone and email and offer an ”on-call” status 14 days before the estimated dues date and 14 days after this date. She stays with the birthing mom from the onset of labor, until 3 hours after birth.
A doula will make a postpartum visit in the next few days/weeks after birth and will offer resources, information and encouragement to the new parents in this very special time of their life. A Hypno-doula is a specially trained doula that assists families who choose to use hypnosis for childbirth. No matter what method they will practice, a Hypno-doula is aware of the special language used during birth, makes sure that the atmosphere is calm and quiet and uses special tools and cues to maintain the mother’s state of hypnosis. Hypnobabies® is the only organisation that certifies Hypno-doulas and I am also one of the only two Certified Instructors teaching the 6 weeks/3 hours a week childbirth education course in Europe.
As 95% of births in Germany take place in a hospital, the need for continuous and emotional support is very obvious. Either they are expecting their first child or they want to make a difference the next time around, the doula is that ”best friend” whose main interest is that mother’s wishes are met. Of course, midwives are wonderful in assisting births in hospitals in Germany, but sometimes caring for more women at once or changing shifts, do not permit them to offer continuous support. While doctors and midwives take care of the mother’s and baby’s medical well-being and intervene if complications arise, doulas are there ”mothering the mother”, assuring her emotional comfort.
Interested moms find doulas online or by word of mouth. The first meeting is usually free, giving everyone the possibility to see if they ”click” together. By asking many questions, the parents will find out if the doula’s skills and experience are what they are looking for.
I first thought to become a doula when I was pregnant with my third child in 2012. My goal was a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) and all information gathered was pointing out the importance of having a doula present at birth. Although I was doing something different professionally before, the idea of becoming a doula was growing constantly in my heart and this is how I’ve found Melanie Schöne and her wonderful course made in collaboration with Debra Pascali-Bonaro on behalf of DONA International, one of the most prestigious (and the first) doulas’ organisations in the world.
The birth of my son was such an intense and empowering moment in my life, that I decided a few months later to take also the Hypnobabies Instructor training in St.Louis, Missouri, U.S.A. I wanted to help other women to have at least the same experience as I did or even better! I wanted to show women that education and informed decisions are the best decisions and how we give birth matters! This hasn’t changed until now and my desire to educate and train myself in this domain has been growing ever since my son was born.
There are many online resources for expats as Facebook groups and forums, where people can get answers. Find a midwife, doctor or doula who speak English or your native language. Take an independent childbirth education course (not a hospital one) or if language is a problem, ask your English speaking midwife/doula to provide books, materials and articles on this topic. If in Hamburg, look for Positive Birth Movement’s meetings! And stay confident! When you start to inform yourself, you’ll see how easier all becomes.
As long as the mother is making an informed decision, knowing all benefits and risks for her and her baby, that is perfectly fine. We are different as humans and we perceive discomfort in different ways. Birth is an unpredictable event and some babies choose challenging positions to be born, which can make labor longer or more intense. Sometimes an epidural can be just the right thing to help an exhausted mom to get some rest, in order to have her baby.
Don’t be mad at me, but having a background in hypnosis and being an NLP freak makes me a little bit nervous about the term ”coping techniques”. Have you heard of the Nocebo effect? Telling someone that they will experience excruciating pain or that they will need to cope, is creating exactly that unwanted result. Because they’ll expect it. Let’s call them ”tools”. 🙂 First of all, address the fear and this, before birth… ASAP! In 1949 a British doctor, Grantly Dick-Read, was describing in his book ”Childbirth Without Fear” the Fear/Tension/Pain cycle. She observed that women who weren’t afraid of childbirth would have easier, uncomplicated births.
Women who fear childbirth or having severe pain activate the fight/flight response through the hormone adrenaline, which produces actually more pain, it can slow down labor or stop it altogether. Using affirmations, surrounding yourself with positive, supportive people will make a difference. A powerful tool in clearing fear is hypnosis or self-hypnosis. Imagine the mind as a computer, with many files and programs that run automatically, our belief systems. In a hypnotic state, moms can re-write the software ”childbirth” in their subconscious minds, accepting more easily positive suggestions. Use your hypnosis during labor!
A side effect of using hypnosis during labor is deep relaxation. The uterus is a wonderful muscle that works beautifully when the mom is perfectly relaxed, without extra tension from adrenaline. When the mother is relaxed, she breathes well, bringing the optimal amount of oxygen to her baby, therefore the birth is progressing well and the baby is not stressed. Hydrotherapy! I loved water at my last birth and many women do. Warm water promotes relaxation and when choosing a water birth, the mother has the possibility to move freely and more easily.
Changing positions in childbirth is essential in helping the baby to descend, thus water is a perfect medium to move. If the baby will be born in water, there are fewer perineal tears and the probability of an episiotomy is 0%!!! Change positions. Some positions like squatting, sitting on a birth stool, sitting on all fours or even standing promote descent of the baby and help her to eventually turn if necessary to be in an optimal position for birth. Your doula can use a rebozo ( a shawl/scarf) to try to turn the baby. Avoid laying on your back or sitting on your tailbone! Double-hip squeeze is a technique that you can learn in a childbirth class ( or not… 🙁 ) and can be applied by the birth partner, midwife or doula. Many women report that they feel much more comfortable when this technique is used. A massage is a great tool, although some women may not like to be touched during labor, even if they liked massage before. Aromatherapy. Good, quality essential oils can make a difference in the birthing room. Try lavender for relaxation and peace, peppermint for nausea, frankincense to promote progress and lemon for refreshment. Use a personal inhaler for that or a cotton pad, do not use it on skin. When the baby is born, all she needs is to smell her mom!
In general, the system in Germany is good, but things have changed a lot in the last few years and there is still bad news for the future. The independent midwives’ situation is very hard at the moment in Germany and only political measures can change this. In the last years’ midwives who offer birth services, had to pay increased liability fees and many of them had to quit their jobs. If want to find a postpartum (Wochenbett) midwife, you have to make sure you start looking while your pregnancy test is still fresh! If your baby is expected in the summer or winter holidays, it may be even harder! The midwifery schools are lacking new students and so are the hospitals.
The “Beleghebamme” (offering continuous support during pregnancy, birth and postpartum time for a hospital birth) is almost a distant memory and in many regions, there are no longer home birth midwives or birth centres to serve women who want such births. What will happen with the right of women to choose their place where to birth? What about educating expectant parents and restorative gymnastics for moms? Who will tell the new moms that they are doing well? Mothers, fathers, midwives, doulas and birth activists have already started numerous petitions and protests. We are in 2018 and there is no solution to this crisis yet and that’s concerning.
The c-section rate is somewhere between 30 and 33%, which is very high (WHO recommends a maximum 15%), but I cannot say which are elective, planned or unplanned surgeries. Elective? Yes, that’s very rare in Germany, but it exists. Although I believe women have the right to make this choice for themselves, there are cases where moms are dealing with a dreadful fear towards natural birth and they take this decision out of fear, not empowerment. FEAR is the big elephant in the room that has to be addressed. Many natural births in Germany have a lot of medical interventions for different reasons, but most of the time, lack of patience from health professionals and mother’s lack of confidence in her own body are the reasons. That is a shame because women’s bodies are made for giving birth and use of routine medical procedure lead often to complications.
Homebirth and birth centre births are (still) great options for women with healthy pregnancies. I believe that there are a lot of misconceptions about that in the western world and I urge every woman to inform herself about this, because the warmth of their own home or a homey atmosphere, without scrubs and septic smells, might be just the right choice for them. Homebirth and birth centre midwives are highly qualified medical personnel and they go through a rigorous screening procedure in order to qualify for such a birth. Nevertheless, the best place to give birth is the one where women feel safest. As a doula, I’ve seen many wonderful births in a hospital set too.
Doulas are not medically trained professionals, thus they do not perform medical tasks as vaginal exams or deliver babies. Homebirth midwives are incredibly skilled people with tones of knowledge and experience and they are in charge with that, otherwise, it is considered to be an unassisted birth. If the birth is imminent and the midwife is not present, I would call 112 and guide the birth partner on what to do.
Immediately after birth, there is a sacred time when I step back and let the family to enjoy their little one. ”This golden hour” is essential for bonding with the baby, offering her the first impression about this world: she is welcomed, loved and protected. When the baby and mother are ready, I help the mother to establish breastfeeding, I make sure she eats something and I can take pictures with the entire family. I leave after 2-3 hours having the parents’ permission and I get back with a phone call in the next few days. I make myself available for providing resources or more information if needed and I visit the family after few weeks when I bring a birth report and a small gift for the baby.
There is a lot of support and resources for mothers in Germany, but they have to inform themselves prior to birth: take a comprehensive childbirth education course, choose a midwife, choose a place of birth – these have a major impact on future incomes in terms of breastfeeding and caring for the baby. Many hospitals in Germany are Baby-Friendly Hospital Initiative, a programme launched by WHO and UNICEF in 1991 that promotes good practices for a good start in breastfeeding. That means that immediately after birth, the baby is placed on the mother’s chest and not separated for the next 1-2 hours. Such hospitals have rooming-in, where the baby is staying all the time with the mother and she doesn’t get any other fluids, but breastmilk.
You could ask in case of a cesarean, to be able to see the actual birth, by lowering the green sheet that stands in front of you and that the baby is placed on your chest immediately after birth. This is called a “family centred cesarean” and has been proven to have immense benefits for bonding and establishing a good breastfeeding relationship. Check before birth if your hospital is willing to accommodate your wishes and has this qualification. Baby-Friendly Hospitals have special trained lactation consultants, with the IBCLC credentials – ask for them if you encounter difficulties. Midwives are the “good soul” of childbirth and motherhood in Germany and make sure you find one before birth, for the postpartum visits. Even if you have your fifth child, there is also nice to hear reassuring words and feel supported in this very sensitive time in a woman’s life. La Leche League in Germany is a great resource for breastfeeding moms and there are also independent lactation consultants who offer their service for free.
And remember: a positive birth is a good beginning for you, as a mother and your baby. Make sure you prepare for this day as you did for your wedding day because it is a day that you will remember for the rest of your life!